Friday 26 June 2009

It’s the only thing that can explain it you know!!!

Once more we return to a big house near the big smoke on a pastoral island just off a massive landmass on a beautiful blue/green planet circling round a wondrous golden electric sun, swaying gently through the spiral arms of a galaxy very, very near………just up the road in fact.

Under the quiet sunny drawing room there is a secret vault. Wherein everything is quiet except for Strap humming a martial tune and admiring the garters. Stockings and Hose hang silently from the ceiling in their own shadows. Cotswold Ninjas they are charged to take one for the Sovereign. The last line of defence.

The Sovereign is seated in front of an Xbox playing Her Defender. Surreptitiously the smell of sulphur enters the room.

“Hose, have you cracked one off again?!” S says calmly. Too calmly. “N-no your majesty” Hose projects back.

“’Tisss only I your Majesssthty” Steams The Lord High Executioner “I thought it besstht to approach sstealthily. We know that Dark Force is abroad”

“Yes ever since the CIA op one has noticed a change in his singing voice. Refresh one’s memory please”

TLHE coils up and gets comfy and starts. “As your majessthty knows…..”

“Drop the affectation grease stain and get on with it” Barks S.

TLHE recoils and starts again. “In the early 1980s DF was chosen to attend CIA screening to check his suitability for main plan inclusion circa Y2K boundary. He passed and CIA put him through a thorough MK Ultra process that gives us the DF operational asset we have had running since 1992. As you know the whole Islington Bistro incident was easily facilitated by that programming. I was there after all. Wonderful stuff! As the years passed we tested DF’s programming by really pissing him off with that air head Emperor Antonius’ antics. DF held firm.”

“Yes but I detect a disturbance in the farce in Westminster TLHE. Is DF still holding steady?” interrogated S.

“Oh absolutely. No doubt about it. DF still believes all that crap economic theory the magician Grunschpeil poured in his ear in the 90s. Currently DF will continue ‘til his dying day believing that only he’s got the answer to the problems. Have no doubt about it your Majesty when the time comes we can switch” The TLHE beamed.

“What about his 2iC, Plums?” S closed.
“Out of the game or he knows he’ll get Smithed” Streamed TLHE.

“Excellent. One is pleased. Once we pass the main event though are our plans for the new controlled assets to be placed on all general election lists complete?” Arced S.

“All are in place. Plan will complete” swelled TLHE.

S warped space/time and TLHE heard in his synapses “Changing the subject. When Der Fuhrertochter gates in from Ost next what do you think she’ll want”

“We all have a common purpose your majesty. No surprises I’m sure”

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Voyoy cheeky, leave us a deadletteredroped..